How to meet a mans emotional needs
Yesterday I posted a video and a brief comment that mentioned the importance of connecting on an emotional level with your spouse. Today I will talk about some ways to do this with a husband, and then in a subsequent post I will discuss how to meet the emotional needs of a wife. Like most men, I tend to not require a whole lot to make me happy on the surface. Women, on the other hand, have a whole other set of needs and what happens is that we each give in relationships what we each want. In other words, we assume that the other has the same needs and wants. Obviously, this is where things can go haywire in a relationship.SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: Understanding the Emotional Needs of Men
SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: When Your Emotional Needs Aren't Being Met in Your Relationship - Brilliant Dating TipsContent:
- Your Partner Cannot Fulfill All Your Emotional Needs
- Gentlemen Speak: The Best Ways to Understand (and Speak) a Guy’s Emotional Language
- The 5 most important emotional needs of a man – Meet his needs
- What Men Want In A Relationship
- Understanding Men Emotionally
- What Do Men Need in a Relationship?
- How To Connect With A Man On An Emotional Level
Your Partner Cannot Fulfill All Your Emotional Needs
Last week I posted an article about the basic emotional needs of women. I typically write articles that are directed toward men, but I get more feedback from women, either in the form of comments, Facebook Likes, or by email.
So today, I want to talk about the basic emotional needs of men. For the women, hopefully this article will help you to better understand your man. Also, it is important to understand that the emotional needs of women from the previous article, and the emotional needs of men addressed in this article, are not exclusive to women and men, respectively. Also, there may be men who have an emotional need of commitment to family again, in the case that his wife works outside the home, and he is a stay-at-home dad.
It is important to have a good understanding of all these needs, so that you are better able to meet those needs for your spouse. Shocking, I know! Who would ever have thought that sex was the number one emotional need of men? Are you sexually satisfied within your marriage? When we get married, we make promises to remain faithful to each other for as long as we live. So, looking a little deeper at our vows, what are we really saying?
As men, we promise to meet the needs of our wives, and we promise to only have sex with her for the rest of our days. We also trust that our wives will meet our own needs — the most important of which is sex. I know that. Most men probably know that. This may lead him to make more of an effort to meet her needs. She meets his needs — he reciprocates. Men, do not withhold meeting her needs as punishment for your needs not being met; likewise for women. This passive-aggressive behavior will lead to big problems in your marriage.
Do you remember when you first met your wife? You were introduced to her, and you thought she was beautiful. Also, she seemed to like football, and could talk somewhat intelligently about it — bonus! Throughout your courtship, the two of you attended several sporting events together, and always seemed to have a great time. I only went with you because I knew you liked it. Believe it or not, men like to do things with their wives outside of the bedroom. Sure, we men like to do things with our guy friends, just as women like to do things with their girl friends.
But the activities we participate in with our friends should never exceed the number of activities we participate in with our spouses. Look, life is too short to spend all your recreational time apart from the person who is supposed to be the most important to you.
There are literally hundreds if not thousands of things the two of you can do together that you both enjoy. Does it require some work to figure these things out? Of course.
Will it be worth it? Each of you should sit down and make a list of everything that you are remotely interested in. After you each have your list, simply look for areas where your interests overlap. The important thing to remember is that when you first start dating, be honest about your likes and interests. If you pretend to like something just because you know the other person likes it, he is going to be disappointed when he finds out otherwise.
When I first looked at the list of emotional needs for men, I found this one to be the most offensive to me. Can you imagine leaving your wife because she is no longer attractive to you? Since this is a need, shallow or not, it can happen. Before anyone gets into an uproar, think about the emotional needs of women from the last article : affection, conversation, honesty, financial security, and commitment to family.
Suppose for just a moment that a woman has a deadbeat husband. He is physically able to work, yet refuses to do so. The wife must get a job — sometimes more than one — just to put food on the table and to keep the lights on. Financially, their household runs short every month, and creditors are constantly calling. The husband is not meeting her emotional need of financial security, is he?
How long, do you think, should she allow that situation to continue before deciding to move on to bigger and better things? Would she be justified in doing so? So, back to this need of men to have an attractive spouse. There was something about her. Something about the way that she looked that attracted you to her. She was beautiful to you. Maybe she has gained a lot of weight you like her thin ; maybe she cut her hair really short you like it long ; maybe she always wears sweats and a t-shirt, and no makeup when she is at home you like when she makes herself up for you.
The point is, all those things that caused you to be attracted to her, she no longer does. Men, if the need for an attractive spouse is one that is most important to you, then you should talk to your wife if she has stopped meeting this need for you.
You need to work this out with your wife, or your unhappiness could lead you to seek beauty in other women. If you notice another woman who is actively trying to attract a man, you may find yourself sliding head-first down a slippery slope. Men, have you ever come home from work, carrying the weight of the day on your shoulders, only to be greeted by kids who are fighting and screaming, and are looking for you to settle their argument?
Also, your wife tells you that she has had it up to here she holds her hand over her head with the kids, and she needs a break. Oh, and by the way, the garbage needs to be taken out, the garage door is squeaking, the faucet is leaking, and this is broken, and that needs to be fixed! Welcome home, honey! If she is a stay-at-home mom, there will certainly be days when she has, in fact, had it up to there with the kids. Do your best to be sympathetic.
Do not run away from this problem, though. Come up with an agreement that you both can live with. Decide that the first hour will be devoted to relaxing with the family. Keep it positive! Ladies, if you are a stay-at-home mom, try to create an environment that is more appealing to him than staying at work is.
If you both work, you need to come to an agreement about who handles what in and around your home. Think about everything from dishes to laundry to grocery shopping to yard work to paying the bills to…you get the picture. Then divide the remainder of the responsibilities equally and fairly between the two of you. Everyone likes to be admired. What is the big deal about admiration? Well, it makes us feel good about ourselves — duh! For one thing, it makes you not want to put forth that amount of effort on future tasks.
Secondly, it hurts your self-esteem. Sounds childish, right? Praise inspires us to keep going. It inspires us to do even better next time so that we can get even more praise! Negative reinforcement causes us to shut down — to quit. Susan Greene pointed out in her comment to the last article , showing appreciation to your spouse goes a long way in creating happiness and satisfaction in your marriage.
Appreciation goes hand-in-hand with admiration. Being the recipient of loving, sincere admiration and appreciation means the world to us. What are some other needs that you men have? Talk about them in the comments below!
Sign up to receive Control Yourself! Facebookers — Check out the Control Yourself! I especially like your comment about recreational companionship, David. My husband and I were best friends long before we ever "got serious. Now, many years down the road, we still enjoy doing things together. It can be a bike ride, a game of tennis or watching a movie.
We look upon them as simple pleasures, and I do feel they help keep our relationship strong. My recent post Home. That is great that you and your husband do so many things together. I've always thought that the old saying of "absence makes the heart grow fonder" is a mistake. Spending time together doing things that both of you like is what makes our relationships stronger. You are commenting using your WordPress.
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Gentlemen Speak: The Best Ways to Understand (and Speak) a Guy’s Emotional Language
Photo by Stocksy. We all have emotional needs. But what exactly is the definition of an emotional need?
Your emotional needs are inner cravings that when they are satisfied, make you feel happy and content. When they are unsatisfied, you are left to feel both empty and frustrated. Understanding the biggest needs of men and women can totally change the dynamic and potential of your relationships. Ignorance is one of the mayor causes of failures in relationships.
The 5 most important emotional needs of a man – Meet his needs
Everyone has emotional needs. When these needs are fulfilled you feel a special love and connection. Emotional needs represent the middle tier of the 3 sets of personal needs: love, emotional, and human. When your partner meets most of your needs, a strong bond and romance develop. These emotional needs focus more in terms of love and romance. Willard Harley, Jr. This landmark work has had a profound impact on millions of marriages worldwide. To put it simply, his many years of research reveals that feelings of romance and love are nothing more than learned association based on triggered responses. What does that mean? In a lab experiment, it might be demonstrated by giving a person a violent shock when showing them a picture of a city, and giving them a comforting massage when showing them a picture of mountains.
What Men Want In A Relationship
Subscribe To Our Newsletter! Whether you are just getting into a relationship or have been in one for decades, it is useful to know what men want in a relationship. It can easy to assume they want exactly what you want, but that does not always prove to be accurate. Below are various ways to give a man what he wants in a relationship.
A few weeks ago I posted a blog about 5 Qualities every woman should look for in a man. Contrary to what society wants to portray we are not these physical animals that only need sex, sustenance and sleep to survive. We have needs that extend beyond the physical.
Understanding Men Emotionally
Last week I posted an article about the basic emotional needs of women. I typically write articles that are directed toward men, but I get more feedback from women, either in the form of comments, Facebook Likes, or by email. So today, I want to talk about the basic emotional needs of men.
In a marriage, both spouses have emotional needs that they desire to fulfill to feel balanced. And when it comes to the most important emotional needs of a spouse, men and women greatly differ from each other. By gaining an in-depth understanding of the emotional needs of a man, you can act as a better wife and thereby be better able to sustain the relationship. Instead, inside their hearts, they often worry whether they measure up and whether they are good at what they do for their women. In other words, men deeply desire to feel able, competent, appreciated, and noticed for what they do for their relationships…. Men naturally have fragile egos.
What Do Men Need in a Relationship?
The Emotional needs of a man is one of the most misunderstood emotions. Our emotions are a combination of a host of factors —mood, temperament, personality, motivation and disposition. That is to say that our emotions are a combination of mental activities and a degree of pleasure or displeasure. The way men respond emotionally is quite different from women. Therefore, it is very important when a woman understands the emotional needs of a man and know what he truly expects from her.
How To Connect With A Man On An Emotional Level
You may feel that your spouse is not meeting your emotional needs. But, marriage counselors and psychology experts generally agree that only you can satisfy those needs. You should not consider yourself an empty emotional vessel to be filled by your spouse.
We hear a lot of talk about the oppression of women, but do we really hear any talk about the oppression of men? Quite frankly, I never have. At least not in the way I'm about to explain. As a life coach and hairstylist for 25 years, I have had my share of up close and personal conversations with men.
Долгая история. Чутье подсказывало Беккеру, что это открытие не сулит ему ничего хорошего. - Все равно расскажите. ГЛАВА 15 Сьюзан Флетчер расположилась за компьютерным терминалом Третьего узла.
Повернувшись, он направился через фойе к выходу, где находилось вишневое бюро, которое привлекло его внимание, когда он входил. На нем располагался щедрый набор фирменных открыток отеля, почтовая бумага, конверты и ручки. Беккер вложил в конверт чистый листок бумаги, надписал его всего одним словом: Росио - и вернулся к консьержу.
- Извините, что я снова вас беспокою, - сказал он застенчиво. - Я вел себя довольно глупо.
Беккер совсем забыл о кольце, об Агентстве национальной безопасности, обо всем остальном, проникшись жалостью к девушке. Наверное, родители отправили ее сюда по какой-то школьной образовательной программе, снабдив кредитной карточкой Виза, а все кончилось тем, что она посреди ночи вкалывает себе в туалете наркотик.
- Вы себя хорошо чувствуете? - спросил он, пятясь к двери.